APPRECIATE THROUGH CRISIS
In my life and work, I became increasingly aware that people with a basically optimistic, positive, and appreciative approach to life had higher overall levels of satisfaction and fulfillment than those who adopted a more negative, skeptical, cynical and disgruntled attitude toward things.
Winners from all walks of life distinguish themselves by their phenomenal ability to appreciate in situations where others would despair.
Appreciation alters brain wave activity and, (given the well-known connection between mind and body) appreciation has a beneficial effect on the body—just as stress, anger, and resentment have a negative effect.
In addition, since brain waves can be a reflection of emotional states, appreciation also has a positive impact on how you perceive the world around you and your relationship to it, as well as on how you feel.
Researchers have measured physiological activity (particularly heart rate variability and brain wave activity) under various emotional conditions, and found that in a state of appreciation, good things happen to your mind, heart, and body: your heart rate slows, your blood pressure drops, and your digestion is facilitated. You feel more peaceful, your stress diminishes, and your immune system benefits.
Appreciation can be applied proactively to change life circumstances.
How can we use appreciation to improve health, relationships, and work life?
How can the conscious use of appreciation increase success and happiness?
How should we use appreciation to transform challenging situations, to effect changes in our lives, and to resolve crises?
The Transformative Nature of Appreciation
What Is Appreciation?
When you think of appreciation, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? Probably something you’re supposed to do, as in “Appreciate the roof over your head, some people don’t have one,” or something you failed to do, as in “You don’t appreciate a thing I do for you!”
Most of us were subjected to such “appreciation-by-guilt,” yelled by an irate parent with predictable regularity throughout our childhoods. If you have children, you may be doing the shouting yourself.
As unpleasant as shouting or being shouted at may be, it tells you worlds about what appreciation really means. When you’re yelling “You don’t appreciate a thing I do for you!” to your kids, what you mean is “You aren’t grateful for what I do for you. You don’t value what I do for you. You don’t see its worth, how meaningful or important this thing I do for you is.”
The upshot is, you feel unappreciated. You’ve probably felt unappreciated in much the same way by bosses, girlfriends, boyfriends, family members, husbands, wives, friends, lovers, co-workers—just about anybody you have ever interacted with. The bottom line is that you feel what you’re offering isn’t valued by the person you’re offering it to, and therefore he or she isn’t grateful for it.
What happens when you do feel appreciated by that child, boss, lover, mother-in-law, or friend? Your spirits soar! You feel that you are important to that person; you feel competent and happy.
Well, you have the same effect on others when you show your appreciation. When you deliberately decide to appreciate people or things, you don’t wish them harm and you don’t do harm. Instead, you nurture, support, and love. As a result, they—and you—are transformed.
A New Definition of Appreciation
The transformative energy of consistent, proactive appreciation can propel your life from good to great, from troubled to joyous, from struggling to successful.
Appreciation can change your very approach to life and living. You’ll learn how to use this energy, which comes not from your usual duty-bound appreciation, not from your politically or socially correct appreciation, nor even from your heartfelt-but-soon-forgotten appreciation, but from a very different type of appreciation.
What kind of appreciation can transform your life?
Appreciation that consists of two vital components: gratitude plus valuing.
It is this combination of gratitude and valuing that gives appreciation its power as a transformative energy.
Gratitude
Gratitude is a receptive energy. It engages your heart. You feel or express gratitude after something pleasing has happened. A friend helps you out of trouble; you are grateful. You notice the good things in your life; you are grateful. Most people are thinking of gratitude when they use the word “appreciation.” Spiritual leaders, authors, and others—from the Dalai Lama to Oprah Winfrey—have extolled the benefits of practicing gratitude through journals, meditation, and an “attitude of gratitude.”
Valuing
The valuing aspect of appreciation is a dynamic energy; it engages your mind. When you value something or someone, you actively use your mind to think of it, why it matters to you, what it is worth to you. In the world of finance, when something appreciates, it grows in value.
The same is true in the rest of our lives. A house is just a space until it is filled with the people and things that you cherish, and then it is a place called “home.”
Because you choose what you think, you can deliberately select thoughts that value someone or something, rather than thoughts that devalue that person or thing.
Consciously choosing to value the people and things in your life is what makes it possible for you to use appreciation proactively. You don’t have to wait for something pleasing to happen in order to start valuing.
You can choose to value someone or something before they have contributed anything at all to your life.
The act of proactively valuing transforms gratitude from an after-the-fact expression of feeling to a before-the-fact, deliberate engaging of energy. This is the energy of appreciation!
Appreciation as Energy
When you step outside the idea of appreciation as gratitude expressed after the fact, and start to think of appreciation as an energy you use proactively with intention, it’s an entirely different experience.
In this regard, appreciation can be likened to electricity.
Electricity can be thought of as a simple tool: you flick a switch when you want light, as a response to the dark. Or, electricity can be thought of as an energy, which can be used as a source of power for any number of uses.
So it is with appreciation. You can think of appreciation as a response to something you are grateful for, or you can think of appreciation as an energy, a source of power that can be harnessed, as electricity is, for any number of uses.
A few examples:
Use the power of appreciation to change your body’s response to stress, and to encourage good health, an enhanced immune system, better energy, and faster healing.
Use appreciation’s power to increase your satisfaction and joy at home and at work, to improve your relationships and increase the love in your life, and to reduce conflict and support cooperation.
Use appreciation to develop better self-esteem and self-confidence, and to better cope with change or crisis.
Focus the energy of appreciation to attract abundance and success.
Use the power of appreciation to attract new relationships (romantic and otherwise) into your life.
Appreciation used deliberately, purposefully, and proactively can transform almost any experience, no matter how challenging, into one you value and are grateful for.
Of all the research I conducted over a thirty year period into human potential and achievement, the transforming effects of applying appreciation in my life has had the most dramatically positive effects.
Mastering the energy of appreciation can rock your world. It can literally be magic for your life.
To read the full article on the benefits of appreciation click here..